My apologies for the really, really, really long silence.
I’m sure you must be thinking, “Most of what this girl writes consists of apologies for her absence. What does she actually write? She must be insane!” I also have the tiny, selfish hope that you might be thinking, “She waits for so long between posts. There must be something worth reading in what she writes.” Right? Right?
Despite the really doubtful question tags at the end, I’ll take the latter thought much better than the former. Hey, everyone gets selfish, right? Even absentee bloggers!
Sorry again, Reader!
Despite the long wait, I have nothing in particular to write about now. Life has progressed too rapidly for me to have stopped and welcomed the flowers of the Spring as they’d arrived. Also, I have been pretty depressed about a couple of -, no, several things which had been laid out and examined for recovery a while ago.
So, since I’ve just about recovered enough to write this post, here I am!
After quite some thought, I present our topic of discussion : Love. I know. I know that this topic has been powdered to the finest granularity and turned over and around in every way possible by everything and everyone in this world. And I know that you have very mixed feelings about it and that, right now, you’re wishing your short-lived assumption that I’m crazy hadn’t been withdrawn so quickly from your mind. It’s okay. Just put it back in your mind. I don’t mind. In fact, as many of my closest friends know, my constant declaration, (as in, one that is mentioned at least a few times every week) is that, “When I call you crazy, that is the best compliment I can ever give you!”
Also, another justification I made to myself is that a writer always has his/her own unique perspective on every topic, even one with already thousands of interpretations such as Love, and it is his/her calling to have expressed this perspective thoroughly. To anyone and anything who might listen (or read). So, even if you’re a ‘bot, keep at the post and I’ll name you C3PO! (The only reference being that I loved C3PO in Episode VII; I have no idea of his significance in the Star Wars Universe. So, any gushing fans, please hold your horses!) But, I digress.
I have lately been exploring writing in the Romance genre. So far, I’ve realised that I’ve had these really strong convictions about how it should go about and I’ve never wondered how these convictions actually came into place.
Mind you, this is NOT going to be a rant-fest of anything from my life. Oh, and one more thing, I am NOT going to talk about the reasons behind Love. It is an absolute dead-end whenever I go down that road and I’m not trying another pointless stroll or a deliberate search down there now.
This is a quote from, well, me. I wrote this down so long ago that I forgot what it came from. But, I strongly suspect an overdose of the Twilight Saga behind it.
“Love is defined as unexplained, spontaneous, unchangeable, continuous trust and faith. It erupts when you do not know it and inspires you into Paradise. It’s unquestionable, even by its Bearer.”
It all boiled down to being able to trust another person with everything that you are and you have. And no, I do not mean physically trusting someone with yourself. It’s more like the belief that whatever you do, talk or experience with this other person is going to be spiritually, emotionally and happiness-inducing-ly good for you. You find everything gets better with them around.
This Love pulls you by your nose into this person’s life teasingly and temptingly. He/She being around you(on the phone glued to your ear or on the phone to whose screen your speed-texting fingers are nearly glued or in person at a coffee shop with a single tall glass of milkshake in front of you and the shop owner churning inside at the tens of potential customers leaving after finding no table vacant) causes you immense pleasure. In my defense, of the examples of togetherness cited above, the last one would be in a case of puppy, teenager Love only. And the exasperating part is that you don’t know why or how.
Oops! Dead end track!
You’d just feel like doing anything and everything with them, with no qualms whatsover.
Conclusion I : Love is the absolute trust you have that the other person is a perfect complement to you and your life.
There’s another level I know of Love. The wanting/needing kind. Sorry I have no statements or quotes to share here. But what I mean is that Love which makes you ache inside when you are not together(again, togetherness in all possible scenarios).
The absence does not hurt any lesser than a giant stab to your heart(this maybe a Giant who is stabbing you or a really giant knife being used in the stabbing or in the worst possible case, both) to some people while others hurt with a multitude of repetitive, bleeding pinpricks to the heart. On either ways, let me tell you right away, it hurts. Like Hell.
You wish desperately for any kind of activity which you can do together. The emphasis being on the togetherness. Things feel settled with the other person around.
Conclusion II : Love is the desperate want of closeness and sharing of experiences you get because the other person makes you feel happy beyond measure.
The third kind comes right about here. Fair warning would be that I’m very much excited about this particular kind and that I dream fervently of being in it. So would you, if you know what I’m talking about.
It’s the kind which just exists all around you, in the air you breathe in, and the dust motes in it which make you sneeze; it’s in the back of your head, like a half-forgotten dream, like a persisting brain tumour; it keeps you going in your everyday work, and makes you feel warm and content inside.
This Love is your soul’s comfort and its confidant. It’s not so much as public displays of affection or long-written love letters; neither is it constant texting nor trying to catch each other’s eyes and seeing the smile hidden in there. It simply exists. It strengthens and nurtures you in all possible ways.
The quote I put forth here is a song from Taylor Swift’s 1989.
“You can hear it in the Silence,
You can feel it on the way Home,
You can see it with the lights out,
You’re in Love.”
Conclusion III : Love is the invisible driver of the human self which overwhelms you into the richest billionaire and humbles you into the poorest critter on the streets. Every second of every day, you feel both surprised and not surprised by its existence, silence ruling over all these emotions. It feels almost too sacred to be spoken of.
There I have it. You can post the comments and enlighten me with your anecdotes about them. I would like to leave it at that hanging note.
PS : I think I added the ‘Coconut Water’ to the title because I started the draft of this post in the Summer days of April on my previous blog. Please forgive me for the stupidity, but it feels bad to have it removed, so its gonna stay there.
PPS : About that silly little depression phase, again, that was during April. So, forget it!